Thanks Owen and Nibbana,

Very true. Luckily, the occurance of the Holidays with all their attendent hustle-bustle sort of forced me out of my obsessive pursuit adn allowed me for a bit to just relax and focus only on experiencing and being aware of my regular dreaming.

I don't know why I got so obsessive there for about a week. I think it was just the excitement of having an LD after so many years of not... I think a little caution is a good thing. It does seem to be somewhat addictive, at least for someone like me who is prone to addictive behavior.

I appreciate your support. Incidentally, I think it is through my sitting meditation and tai chi practice that I foudn myself in the lucid game again at all, so I agree, focusing more on relaxation will likely be a good thing for me. I'll keep you posted.

returning your wishes of a peaceful and joyous new year, James

Bad habits...has anyone had similar experience to me?

I started with the DILD induction techniques in July. At the end of September I had my first lucid dream and have had 11 in all, some short some long at regularly spaced intervals since then. However I have had no lucid dream now for over three weeks when I thought they might have started to increase in frequency. In fact my last two dreams were very short, I spun and spun saw some shapes then awoke. I appreciate from the forum that there are setbacks and beginners can have long spells without success, but after all the hard work I have somewhat negative feelings of disappointment.

On the positive side my dream recall has increased amazingly by hard work. I can recall a lot of detail now. And I seem to spend a lot of time in my dreams looking at things and thinking, and puzzled by the things I see. Last night for example everyone was dressed in black and my mind returned to this several times in the dream'..but did it occur to me that I might be dreaming?!! I believe that my prospective memory has improved. I am picking out more dreamsigns when awake, and I can discipline myself much better to carry out MILD. I nap once or twice a week and I can get back to sleep, no insomnia problems I had in the beginning.

So I lie there in the early morning focused on recognising the dream state and there I go drifting in and out of the NON-LUCID dream state.

So to my questions. How does one tell if one is trying too hard? Is it possible to become sensitized to the induction techniques such as intention-reflection? Would it be good to have a spell completely off or ban myself say 2-3 days a week from the daytime practice? Paul Tholey in one of his papers claims that once beginners have experienced lucidity, critical state testing during the day becomes less important. One strategy I thought of is to focus solely on recognizing of dreamsigns and just test my state then? So many possibilities! I am disinclined to get a Novadreamer just now until I clarify the situation as I do not want to get sensitized to that.

I would be grateful to hear of others experiences.

A happy and successful New Years dreaming to all!

Owen

Owen...

I have been hearing a lot of reports about dry spells in the last few weeks... and I have been in one too..

I wouldn't be at all surprised is some sort of phenomenological event could have something to do with it... such as there has been unusually high sun spot activity recently... don't want to sound too esoteric, but such a thing might affect us in ways we are unaware of... or the length of daylight vs. night, or eating all those holiday sweets!! who knows? but it's not about tallying dream points... it's just exploration... so I am just trying to explore my dreaming as much as I can, and continue working on trying to get lucid, whether it happens or not... the goal for me is to be as aware as possible, not to become "more aware" if that distinction makes sense...

Best of luck! James

James, thanks for you feedback. That's interesting. I had myself thought that I might have been affected by the Christmas break, eating and drinking a little too much than I ought I'm afraid.

What do you mean by aware? Do you mean trying to develop your general awareness of things around even when awake? I find the prospective memory exercises very interesting. I have improved but I'm still amazed how I miss targets. But I've discovered that just practicing hitting a target, eg looking at my watch again and again actually reinforces for an hour or say and I hit the target, ie looking at my watch. I think this must be the basis of MILD.

Something else I've noticed, I'll use the same example. If today I'm doing my watch and then swithc tomorrow to a different target(s) eg light switch + someone says my name, I'm sure I improve in recognising the previous days target. It was this actually that made me think of experimenting with giving up thinking of lucid dreaming for a day or so if you see what I mean.

Owen

Hi, Owen

It's not easy to decide, when to work hard or when to let go. But it is good to keep on, I find it worthful to work on myself, even if it takes years or my whole life. See my latest LD. It illustrates frustration (dry spells for long times) and success.

Yours

Ralf

Thanks Ralf,

I had a lucid experience last night after recognising a dreamsign but woke up immediately, no time even to spin.

I think something is trying to tell me something. I'll keep on, but I think I'll focus on WILDs for a bit. I've never had a WILD.

Regards, Owen

Dear Owen and fellow oneironauts,

Realizing that you've been "puzzling over things" within the dream is an excellent sign that your level of critical awareness is on the rise. When you encounter potential dream signs while awake, what do you do with your puzzlement? Personally, I enjoy lingering there, savoring the sensation of oddness, followed by a reality check and the imagined accomplishment of an intended goal. Those moments of bewilderment provide a wonderful opportunity to observe how you will most likely respond to similar situations while adream and help prepare you for those auspicious occasions.

When you ask "How does one tell if one is trying too hard?" If you're feeling continued frustration, that's a fair clue. Sometimes a pattern of misses can actually lead to a step in the right direction, but what I've found works best is a relaxed approach, considering the journey itself as important and worthwhile, as well as entertaining and sometimes nearly as wondrous as the actual experience of lucidity itself. The best advice I can offer is to make your intentions sincere -- each and every time you reflect on your dreams and examine the dream signs that were missed. I don't believe you're likely to become de-sensitized to induction techniques as long as you can keep your sincerity in tact. The most important point, however, is to keep a positive attitude. Go ahead, sigh aloud and shake your head in amazement, but with the next intake of breath, vow "Next time...!"

If you're considering using a NovaDreamer, you may want to begin including lights in your daytime awareness exercises. And I wouldn't worry about getting de-sensitized to the cue for a long, long while (it took me about eight years!). And with the improvements offered in the SuperNovaDreamer, you'll have even less tendency towards habituation.

Wishing you many moments of ooh, ah, and yes!, Keelin

Keelin,

Thanks for your advice. I am beginning to appreciate the importance of "sincerity'. I associate it too with discipline!! I had an amusing dream this morning. I woke up in bed and it was already quite light. I looked around the room and began to think about doing a state test. As I have temporarily stopped looking at writing as a state test and don't use digital clock now, I tried pressing hard on the bed to try to make my hand go through. The bed and bedclothes felt perfectly normal. "Do I really have to get out of bed and jump up and down, it's so cosy here?' Well I dragged myself out of bed reluctantly. My left foot got caught firmly in a knot in the bedclothes (certainly a dreamsign). So I was trying to disentangle myself while hopping around on my right foot (no floating). I got free, forgot about doing the state test, decided to go to the bathroom then back to bed for another twenty minutes to try for a lucid dream. I opened the bathroom door'..and awoke.

There is one thing you seem to suggest that I am, cautiously, not completely convinced about so far ' having a break if frustrated. Learning to dream lucidly is not easy. But so is learning golf or to play the piano. I don't think a good reaction to frustration at the keyboard is to say, well I'll give it up for a few weeks. My strategy has been to plod on and cope with the frustration of dry periods by becoming interested in non-lucid dreams as well. This is very important to me. I have restarted MILD and have had some success in the last two weeks. Doing MILD properly is quite stressful and I believe I have trained and push myself to cope with it. Last week I achieved a goal of LDs on two successive nights. The first was very brief but in the second I met and embraced my long deceased Father which was nice. I guess we are all different and an approach to learning lucid dreaming that suits one person might not suit another. Obviously if one becomes too obsessed this is bad, unfortunately the dividing line between sincere and sustained effort and an obsession is not always a clear one and it is necessary to be vigilant I think!

Hope I am not being too serious :-)

Owen

Hello out there,

Does anyone have pointers how to train for achieving WILD? I find it hard to "enter" the dreamstate, seems I always drift out of it when I get close to it. The problem with it is that on each such "dive" I get progressively more wakeful, which kind of ruins training...

Thanks, Chris

Hi, Chris

How or what do you feel, when you get to close? Do you really try to dive, do you really intend movement, do you make an effort? Beeing too active prevents from entering dreamstate. Refer to pp 98/99, Exploring the World of Lucid Dreaming: "Do not try to actively enter the dream scene,..."

Yours Ralf

Hello Ralf,

I try to turn off my eyes, so the dream-state images can arise and be seen. This is very hard, and seems possible only as I drift towards sleep. Either I become aware of the images, being not fully awake, but as I become aware of them they fade. Or it feels as if I am looking down, or bending down, and I am suddenly "there" with the images, but as I have awareness of it, and of the "movement" that I did, again I drift out and back to "seeing with my eyes". It would be nice to learn to have awareness of the images without this.

Chris

Hi, Chris

Perhaps you can try to focus on the pictures, that arise out of the dark and "simply" forget about turning off your physical eyes. It seems, that you spent too much energy in turning off. I imagine, that you hang onto your physical body in doing so. Another hint: I have never been able to forget something by using willpower. You may trust in the autonome psychological process to do it for you. Or: If I focus on my right thumb, I am likely to forget my right foot. But if I try to focus on my right thumb and try to focus on forgetting my right foot, I work hard, but it seems, that I won't succeed. As long as I focus on both, I won't get the thumb alone. If I forget focussing, I loose awareness of both, thumb and foot. For me it is this way: Once aware, that I'm inside a picture, I am frightend at the new situation, about no longer feeling my body, and in this way throw myself out of the picture or dream scene. Back into feeling my physical body. It took a lot of training on this border of dreaming and awakening, until I finally had success in an afternoon nap. There are some factors concerning success in WILD, I claim beeing important:

1. The point of time (later in the night /early morning/ afternoon)
2. Deep relaxation of the body.
3. A very calm and focussed mind
4. Being able to surrender, to let go of "normal" body - sensation, of normal "Ego" sensation and to stay aware, i.e. focussing on pure awareness while I let myself float into the dream.

Hope you find this hints worthful.

Yours Ralf

Dear Owen,

What I hoped to relay in my response (to your question about trying too hard) was the idea that a relaxed attitude, along with a dedicated pursuit of lucid dreaming, might be the best combination (sincerity of intention being part of the dedication factor). Of course, you're absolutely right about each person needing to find what works best for him/herself. And, by all means, an interest in your non-lucid dreams will greatly serve to assist you in your efforts and journey. Non-lucid dreams can teach us what to look for -- next time!

;-> Keelin

Dear Chris,

When I first began attempting WILDs, I found that sometimes the onset of hypnagogia was so startling it quickly snapped me to waking mode. Other times it was more subtle, but so attractive and intriguing, it was as if I grabbed onto it too forcefully, only to have the imagery dissolve as quickly as it arose. What has come to work best for me is a few moments of mildly detached observation which allows the imagery a chance to unfold. For example, one evening I woke mid-night, reflected on the prospects of returning directly into REM, then closed my eyes and told myself that whatever imagery I saw next would be the stuff of which dreams are made. In a few moments, it seemed as if I'd opened my eyes, for the room was appropriately dark and I was in bed, lying in the same position I'd awoken in only moments before. And yet, it appeared that a movie was being projected onto the surface of the wall directly in front of me. The imagery was faint, but as I lay there relaxed and somewhat mesmerized, it slowly gained vividness and depth. Soon the two figures in the scene blossomed into three-dimensional characters. At that point, I felt the environment was established well enough and my dream state stable enough that I (that is my dream body) could slide out of bed and begin to interact with them.

I'm not sure if this personal experience is at all helpful for you. I've been trying to think of some exercise that might assist you in developing the ability to observe and retain your hypnagogic images while they gain substance. Practicing the feeling of detached observation may be of some benefit. Perhaps you can explore this in waking life by choosing a social situation in which you can observe quietly from a distance for a few moments (imagining the scene as dream hypnagogia), before becoming engaged in it. Of course, if everybody disappears... ;-> Or you might try watching a film (again, pretending it's dream imagery) and noting the various degrees of your emotional involvement throughout.

Below is an excerpt from a previous post on the topic of WILDs for whatever help further comment may provide:

WILDs are my favorite type of dreaming and are easiest for me in the wee hours of the morning, often after I've been awake for a long time (45-60min) during the night. I've also managed a few after an hour or so of napping on the couch prior to going to bed at night. The common element here appears to be wakefulness between sleep episodes.

Vol. 3, #2 issue of NightLight featured an interesting experiment which compared the effectiveness of two kinds of mental focusing for initiating WILDs: the "Counting Method" (One, I'm dreaming, Two, I'm dreaming...) and the "Body Method" (aka: 61 Point Body Focusing Technique). In my own experience with this experiment, I found that both methods induced lucidity, but in different ways. The Body Focusing Technique led directly into WILDs, while the Counting method produced DILDs, often without a definitive dreamsign (ie: I simply realized at some point that I was dreaming).

I've also had some success with WILDs via what I've come to think of as "dream body rocking" -- a rather odd sensation that's become notably familiar to me over the past few years. It is always enjoyable and often precedes or accompanies the onset of lucidity. Usually it feels as though my body is vividly rocking side to side (as in a cradle), though sometimes the motion is in an impossible forward/backward direction. The speed can vary dramatically. Because I've begun to associate this sensation with the onset of lucidity, I've occasionally been able to use it as an induction method. The following is an example:

Lying awake in bed, I imagine the pleasurable sensation of my body rocking gently side to side. As the visualized sensation grows more vivid, the image of a small rowboat forms around what I now know is my dreambody. I willfully enhance the rocking until I roll right out of the little boat and into the dream Sea, fully lucid and ready to explore without any hesitation or fear.

Ah! Is that a dream image I see resting in the palm of your open hand? Keelin

Dear Keelin, Thanks for your friendly note, and thanks to Ralph too. Maybe it is a question of persistence and time: the positive development over the last 6 months is that losing the dream scene is slower than it used to be. Chris

Keelin et al:

I seems to have entered a 'dry spell' over the last week or so, and a question has ocurred to me. I have found that phases of full moon coincide with general sleep disturbances, such as wakefulness, and proliferation of normal dreams - but I have not noted before that fewer LDs happen during these periods. Is their any data relating the full moon to LDs?

Incidentally, I think you, Keelin, are a treasure to us all - both as a lucid dreamer, and a lucid writer :-)

Dear Alan,

Not sure if there's any research on the full moon effect, but will check with LI about it and report back. Your mention of moon tides make me wonder what might happen if one dreams the moon full. NovaDreamer users would surely toss it a smiling nod!

May the lucid rains return soon, Keelin

PS: And thank you for your kind words. I read them thrice (to see if they'd morph!) ;->

Dear Alan, et al,

Regarding the full moon effect on lucid dreaming:

Stephen LaBerge informed me that he knows of no studies addressing this topic. In addition, he found no pattern in his thousands of lucid dreams that would have led him to question a monthly or lunar cycle.

Have the lucid rains returned for you?

Wishing you a sweet monsoon, Keelin

Hi all,

I'm a newbie oneironaut (see my introduction I posted under "Lucid Dreaming Induction Devices: The NovaDreamer: NovaDreamer Experiences). I read this whole topic to see if I could find the answer to my frustrations before posting my question. And I found it, right at the end (Keelin, Feb. 8). Thanks!

I just had one thing I wanted to add to explain my problem, which is almost identical to Chrisoph's. I have gotten very good at relaxing very deeply, and in fact can switch on sleep paralysis virtually at will, especially after waking up from a night's sleep or a nap. My arms and hands especially become numb and asleep, as though I'd cut off circulation to them. I feel that all I need to do at that point is slow down my brain and enter sleep, but I remain awake and in various degrees of alertness. I can remain in this state for an hour before I finally just get sick of being awake. At times I start to drift off, but then jolt back as I realize I'm about to lose consciousness (I'm trying to induce a WILD).

I feel like there is a thin veil seperating me from at-will WILD's, but just can't seem to break the barrier.

I'll try Keelin's advice. I think I already do this, but maybe I'm not detached enough. I feel like if I detach too much, I'll just fall asleep and won't become lucid. Part of the problem is, I don't have too much imagery to really latch onto. It's all sort of vague and murky. Any further suggestions?

Thanks, and looking forward to talking with you all!

Mark

Hi Mark,

Cool to see someone has some similar problems to what I experience at the moment. I've been able to tell when I'm going to have Sleep Paralysis.... for some reason I can feel when it's going to come on. Last week I had 3 consecutive nights of Sleep Paralysis and I had 3 Lucid Dreams, 1 each of those nights. Nothing now for a week, and I'm getting rather frustrated.

Good to meet you, Daniel

Alright, talk about frustrating... I had two "close calls" last night. Here are two dreams I had.

I was hanging out with some guy who seemed to be mentally retarded. He started talking to himself. He was repeating the sequence of events that led up to that moment in reverse chronological order. He was saying "And before that," "And before that'" I suddenly wanted to talk to him, where before I think I found him annoying. I wanted to practice remembering the chain of events, because that's an exercise for lucid dreaming. I was excited I could practice with this guy, since he was so single-minded he could actually help me.

I had a false awakening. I saw the Nova Dreamer flashing in my eyes. I woke up, took the mask off, and counted about 19 cues. Then I really woke up. Ironically, when I checked the Nova Dreamer for real, there were 19 cues. How's that for weird?

One thing that's helped me with my frustrations, though, is to just not worry about it so much. I've turned the volume down on the reality checks and so forth, so I don't get too obsessed about it. I'm just relaxed about it, and will let it happen when it happens.

Happy dreams!

Mark

Mark,

I had a similar kind of frustrating episode this week.

"A car stopped in front of me. A man got out and I saw that his back was covered in white dust. I was excited because this was a good opportunity to test my state. I jumped up and down twice, then went my way. I was still puzzled by the man and turned round to look at him, he had changed into a woman. I continued walking"

In my opinion there are two important things here. First my brain was not sufficiently "alert" because I had not woken myself up completely before the sleep period that contained the dream. Second I believe it is most important to follow Keelin's advice and pay special attention to sincerity while state testing during the day. I focus and remind myself that although it seems that I am awake I feel like that too when I am dreaming. Then I really try hard to change some writing or morph an object or delay my descending jump before concluding that I am awake. Then I focus hard on drawing the correct conclusion.

Owen

Dear Owen

I've only one important question: How do you manage to have this many lucid dreams?

I browsed through your posts in LI Forum. You started to work on LD in June 2000. This is a quote from a posting in August 2000: " Hello, I am a new member of the forum. I have been trying hard to induce lucid dreams now for about two months using reality/critical state testing techniques as described in Stephen LaBerge's book, but with no success so far."

This is a quote from one of your latest posts: " I have had many frustrating experiences with spinning, often I seem to stop and give up too soon."

You often seem to be frustrated, but continue coping with LD. And you succeed! Maybe I should have a try and use the spinning technique more often in combination with state - checking. And maybe I should post more often under the topic "Frustration Support.." Seems to be a way to succeed. And surely I'm going to learn a lot during dream camp.

Keep on good work

Yours Ralf

Hey everyone.

I rekon frustration is the cause of not having Lucid Dreams. Recently I have not had even the remotest feel of a LD, except for last night. Had a touch of the Sleep Paralysis, which I find usually ends up turning into a Lucid Dream experience, but now I find I try to hard when I get the paralysis feeling !!! AAArrrhhh !!! There's just no happy medium is there. Once you think you've got, you lose it.

Well, back to the drawing board. I'm trying various experiments, like, sleepingin different positions, different pillows, eating stuff before sleep, etc etc. I shall keep everyone posted.

"Mary Mary, quite contrary" Daniel

Ralf,

I started my dream journal on July 5 2000. I had my first LD in September, then 3-4 per month until February, then an increase. This April I had 10 LDs. To be honest, I am a bit tired from goal-getting and feel a need to prepare myself psychologically for a step backwards. Clearly I do not want to get the point where I am frightened to go to bed because I cannot face the disappointment of not having an LD :-)

My progress sounds good, but a frustration right from the beginning is that most of my LDs are short. My goal has been to increase the frequency of LDs because it is only by having frequent lucid dreams that I can test the various ways of staying in the dreams longer.

However because I plan, I usually manage to do one or two new things in each dream. For example in a dream last week, I saw coins on the ground, a dreamsign, became lucid, rubbed my hands which did seem to solidify things, then resolved to and did fall backwards - a new thing. I floated and then awoke. And I have also mentioned my black void adventures, a way of making the best of a rather disappointing situation.

My strategy has been, without interfering with work or other important activities, to take every opportunity during the day to think about LD/NLDs theory and to do state testing and visualisation sincerely. If I get tired with it, then I FORCE myself to continue. Many nights I insist that I wake up my mind completely even if I do not get out of bed and my body and eyelids are screaming for sleep. But this can take a toll and, as I say above, I need to face the possibility of a nasty pay-back time! I'm amazed that Stephen LaBerge could have done a doctorate on this with the NEED to increase his frequency of LDs....I think it would have driven me mad with worry!

One irritating experience is that the last few months my LDs come in clumps, for example I will go for two weeks with nothing, and then have 4 LDs in three days. Thrice I have had 2 LDs on one night. Really I have not been able to identify any explanatory factor. Except that it seems when I am most down...I'll I never get it, I'll never have a really long LD..... it is just then that I have a good dream. By contrast when I've had the 4 in three days and I'm brimming with confidence....I've cracked it....then I cannot reproduce it. Well unlike Daniel, for me frustration seems to help!!

I have made one mistake which I believe I discussed with you before, and you gave me good advice which only now I started to act on. During the day, if, for example, I imagined seeing my dead Father, I tried to reproduce the shock sensation that I would have actually felt if he was actually there. The rationale was that this would make the situation more "dreamlike" more "sincere". I got quite good at this so that I could feel it, perhaps a small surge of adrenalin. This got through to my dreams. So I would have dreams in which I identified a dreamsign, realised I was dreaming/got the shock and woke up all in the same moment...might even have woke up before realising I was dreaming. Now I am deliberately nonchalant, calm, deep breaths during the daytime tests, and I hope this will pay off.

I have another theory for premature awakening in a case like mine suggested by the above. This is that the activated state of mind required for lucidity is more likely to be attained while I am waking up...then I have trouble with visual break up...because I am in the process of awakening. Some support for this comes from my personal observation that if I do catch it and can spin, then come out of the spin, the scene is more real and solid and the dream longer. If my problem is that I am just awaking prematurely because I am too excited etc, why does this not also happen after a successful spin...I could be just as excited that the spin has been successful and just as worried that the dream will end?

Have a good time at dream camp, hope I can get there one year!

Owen

It's also been my experience that my lucid dream come in "bunches". Like, I tend to have them a week apart for 2-3 weeks, then nothing for 3-4 weeks.

I also have a question I'd like to pose: What counts as a lucid dream? Sometimes I'm not sure. One that I had was, I thought I was dreaming, and my wife convinced me I wasn't. I count it, because for a moment I feel that I was. Also, just this morning, the NovaDreamer woke me up twice. I don't remember what I was dreaming about, and I didn't go back into a dream that I recall, but I felt sleep paralysis and the lights turned from red to white as I was drifting back off. I feel like I was in a dream state, even if nothing was happening, sort of like in "The Matrix" where Neo is standing in a pure white environment. Was it actually a dream, the lights turning color? Or was it just a physiological effect of some sort?

Here's another interesting LD I had. I was dreaming that I was going to a meeting with someone. They told me the meeting would be held in a lucid dream. Sure enough, when I arrived, we went to sleep and conducted the meeting in a dream. I woke up a couple of times and went back in. Now, I'm counting this as a lucid dream, but really, I was only lucid in the dream within a dream. Am I cheating?

Anyway, I've been busy lately and not keeping up as well as I'd like with reality checks etc., so I'm working on getting my mind back on it. Good luck to you all! See you in the dream world.

Mark

Hi, Mark

I suggest, that you read "Varieties of Lucid Dreaming Experience" by Stephen LaBerge and Donald J. DeGracia. There are some hints, especially III.A.3. Ambiguities in Lucidity Induction. Quote How is one to classify such an experience? What we see here is a lucid dream nested perfectly inside a nonlucid dream. End Quote Reference:

http://www.lucidity.com/VOLDE.html

Yours Ralf

Keelin...Ralf...anyone Help!! :-(

After "boasting" of my progress to Ralf, 10 LDs (actually it was 11) in April I seem to have "collapsed'. (I also had 10 LDs in March, again in clumps.) So from nearly 3 per week in these two months, now nothing at all for two weeks.

It's strange that after my last LD, I felt under pressure to maintain this momentum and it was just too much. I could hardly bring myself to do state tests doing the day. I even had the irrational thoughts that I would not have LDs again! Well I had a break and I feel a little better now.

However I would like to pick folks brains about these often talked about dry spells. Also I note a couple of people saying that they had quite a few LDs in the first year and then they petered out or rather became less frequent. Obviously I'm concerned now to avoid making an error.

One perhaps rather negative aspect of my own experiences is that many LDs begin spontaneously within a NLD. I do not really seem to be getting better at going from the identification of a dreamsign to lucidity via a state test.

Given that I have been doing RCs so often during the day it is not quite clear why I do it so seldom in my dreams. However given that I've had quite a lot of LDs this last year, there must be "something" that I'm doing during the day that is causing these. I believe I carry out my RCs sincerely and diligently.

There has been talk of habituation (eg with NovaDreamer). What I am a little concerned about is whether I could become habituated to this "something'.

I find it difficult to believe that one can become habituated to dreamsigns, surely the more you practice recognizing dreamsigns during the day the more you are likely to do the same thing in dreams. And surely the whole idea of prospective memory tests is to train yourself to become ever better to respond to cues, and to avoid habituation. I presume that Novadreamer cue habituation occurs where the dreamer wears the Novadreamer but is lax in trying to identifying cues in dreams (and during the day).

Owen

Hi Owen,

First let me congratulate you on the impressive progress you've made since you started posting to this group. You've really come a long way, and I believe your diligence (and sincerity ;->) has been paying off!

I think it's not so unusual to go through "dry" spells when it comes to lucid dreaming. Just like there are times when we're more more automated than conscious in waking life. I wouldn't be overly concerned with a temporary dip in the frequency of lucid dreams.

One thing that might help is to make sure you have a goal you'd like to pursue in your next lucid dream that is truly exciting. That usually does it for me when I'm going through a dry spell. Often times an effective goal for me has something to do who helping someone (like doing an experiment that contributes to lucid dream research or conjuring up some healing images for a friend in need).

As for dream signs and habituation, I think it is possible to get into a habit of missing anomalies. I still sometimes miss the cue of riding my old skateboard (which I gave away when 20 years ago!). I just got so used to sidewalk surfing in Dreamland that the novelty of it eventually wore off -- and -- I neglected to make the sincere vow with each miss to catch it next time.

With the NovaDreamer, habituation is a little different in that one can get used to the settings after a long while. After several years, I had to increase the brightness and length of cue and sometimes had to take a break from using it. But, of course, by then, I was only using it for the fun and challenge of catching the incorporations. In the meantime, all the other training had had its effects.

And you're right about prospective memory being a key factor -- hence the self-assigned tasks to build up this skill are very important. The better one gets at remembering to do something in the future, the more likely one is to accomplish one's goals -- be that with lucid dreaming or with lucidity in waking life.

May your next lucid dream be sweet and soon, Keelin

Keelin, thanks for the support.

I have been practicing flame meditation. I can visualise the flame but keeping it going is difficult.

In one of my last lucid dreams, when I was spinning in the black void I tried to visualise the flame. I found in this admittedly short attempt that I could not do this. I was curious as to whether I would see a strong lucid image of the flame.

If I can generate the flame I plan to follow it. I believe that it will lead me to my dream guru. When I find him (or her) I am going to pump them for some hot lucid dreaming tips which I will post on the forum (with the permission of my guru).

In April I did manage to play a piano. I generated it in the black void. I played a couple of scales, though the lid kept falling on my hands. It was vivid but the notes sounded distant and tinny.

Owen

Dear Owen, Keelin and fellow dreamers

Now it's my turn to post in this thread.

My problem: I get lucid, but wake up instantly. There is no time to do anything, I simply slip out of the dream.

My practise: I do RC on oddities in waking time. 6 - 10 per day. These are no prospective tasks. I don't plan the occasions, but simply intend to recognise strange things and do RC. Since dream camp, I use a digital watch. Once convinced, that I'm awake, I recall a dreamscene and imagine myself getting lucid in the face of a dreamsign. I tell myself: Soon I will be dreaming. Next time I'm dreaming, I will remember to recognise, I'm dreaming. And then I will fly. I imagine myself enjoying a nice flight.

I do naps. I practise the counting - technique. I focus on staying aware. Maybe because of this practise I have the habit to "awake", once I recognise, that I'm dreaming. I'm working on surrendering to the pictures and scenes and it seems, that I will sooner or later overcome my fear of being torn apart from physical body's perception and being merged into a dream.

My question: It seems, that I should work on stabilising the dream, before I perform any other task. Should I do some hand rubbing? Should I set different intentions while doing the counting - technique? What are your suggestions?

See you in LD

Yours Ralf

Dear Ralf,

I have the following three types of short dreams.

1. Occasionally it happens that I recognise an anomaly and as I become lucid'whooooosh'I'm awake. I have not been logging these as LDs as I cannot always convince myself that I did become lucid before I awoke.

2. Very often I become lucid and immediately my visual field becomes jagged and distorted, I enter the black void and then awake. These are quite common. Fortunately I have now learnt that I have a couple of seconds to seize the initiative and spin immediately. The situation can thus be saved.

3. I become lucid and everything seems OK. Perhaps I've spun, rubbed my hands and carried out one brief task eg look in the mirror or morph my hand. Then whooooosh, without warning, I'm awake, no time to spin or anything. This is quite annoying. I note however that it is often associated with me having completed a task and am reflecting on, perhaps at a loss about, what to do next. This suggests a solution of course, I need to better prepare myself with my task list while awake.

My suggestion is that you might focus on spinning as your immediate lucid task rather than flying. Immediately you become lucid, spin! If a dream scene does not appear quite quickly, try feeling your body or bend down and explore the ground, trying to maintain the spinning sensation if possible. This is worthwhile and interesting in itself and distracts from any fear that the spin will come to nothing.

Regarding category 1. above I do have some concern that my WILD practice might be encouraging this rapid awakening. During the couple of hours before I arise I have made I think some but rather little progress towards having my first WILD; I find it extraordinarily difficult to focus on the mantra'one, I'm dreaming, two I'm dreaming'or any other mantra or visualisation. However I have had some fun during brief afternoon naps and when I first go to sleep trying to recall the dreamlets that flash through my mind. Following the method of Ouspensky, I continually try to observe what has just previously been in my mind. After nine months I find that if I am genuinely vigilant I can recall a lot. But as you will recognize, to recall it is necessary to wake oneself up, so I am continually fluctuating between wakedness and sleep (presumably stage 1). Am I training myself for category 1 above? I just don't know. Obviously someone experienced in WILD might go straight through to the dream so this negative training will be bypassed. On the other hand if you do not carry out the Ouspensky method, then there will not be practice towards achieving a WILD.

Owen

Frust Supp Group

Dear Owen

Thanks for your response. I don?t count these type 1. dreams as lucid, either. Maybe they are prelucid, because dreamsign awareness gets higher. I just started adding handrubbing as the first thing to do, after becoming lucid. Maybe spinning would be more effective. I suspect, I could wake up the physical body, if I intend a movement of my whole body. I will go on intending hand - rubbing. If it doesn?t work, I shift to spinning. It?s good to read about your lucid experiments. Very inspiring. I?m getting nearer. There have been some occasions, when I nearly entered a dream in a nap. Like diving into a hole. But I have still been too frightened. Dreamsign awareness is going up. I?ll keep you posted on progress.

Lots of thanks

Yours Ralf

Hi All, I wasn't here a long long long time. I was busy, School in my country has very very high standarts, so I have to invest every power I've got in it. Besides that, everyday life is a bit stressing here.

I had abandened for a while lucid dreaming (passivly & activly) because I didn't get much sleep with all the studying. I had my ups & downs with LDing, I got to a point where I had at least 6 LD every week and some nights more then 5. But now, I don't have any. I am re-working on my dream recall and it is back to normal (3 - 5 dreams a night) but I don't have LDs. I am working on WILD, but I am stuck in this point: I close my eyes, I listen to my breathings and count. After a few minuets, I start rotating in 2 different directions at the same time and lose feelings of my body, it's very heavy & light at the same time, very difficult to explain, you have to feel it. A start spinning very fast if I look at my third eye (that dot in the center of the forhead). I feel I am close to get in to the dream because I can feel all those vibrations people talk about. But I just don't know how to start the dream. What do I need to do? I don't see any hypnogogic imagry, just very very very strong sensations. What should I do?

Thank you, Guy, guyw@zipmail.com

Ralf, I've found that rubbing has worked a few times, I can see the scene solidify, but does not work always. Some swear by saying aloud "Increase clarity NOW" and such like. I plan to try this while rubbing. I still have this hunch that we wake up too soon because we become lucid as we are awaking, the brain is more receptive then.

Owen

Dear Ralf,

I've been enjoying the accounts of your journey to learn lucid dreaming at will. Thank you for sharing all the detailed details. Of course, I know from our time at DreamCamp what a very observant fellow you are, so I'm not really surprised by your meticulous note taking.

It sounds to me like you are doing all the right things, so perhaps all that is missing is time and more adventures.

Your comment:

I focus on staying aware. Maybe because of this practise I have the habit to "awake", once I recognise, that I'm dreaming.

I think there may be something to this. It reminds me of some of my experiences as a lab subject. In those situations, I often have high performance anxiety, a sort of hyper-vigilance that makes it difficult for me to relax enough to fall asleep. Once I finally drift off, I tend to wake completely the moment I enter REM. The last time I was in the lab, I finally fell asleep and saw the image of a computer screen with the prompt "Sleeping? [YES] [NO]. Thrilled to realize I was, I clicked on YES and immediately woke up. Frustrating indeed!

I would also agree with your idea of surrendering to whatever images arise. See if you can hold them gently as if in the open palm of your hand and try to observe with something of a detached perspective. And when an image arises that lingers, then try rubbing your hands, even if it feels as though you might only be imagining this action.

When it comes to hand rubbing verse spinning, personally, I usually prefer hand rubbing. Spinning (in any realm) feels "muchwhat" disorienting and tends to blur the imagery for me. It's not something I commonly do in waking life (I can barely manage a single decent pirouette as it is), while hand rubbing doesn't distort the scene and can be done just about anytime, anywhere, and it's a bit more acceptable to do in public. I've found spinning to be a preferred technique, however, when a quick scene change is desired. (Here to Maui in a split second -- and there's no jet lag!)

Hope these suggestions will be helpful for you, Keelin

PS: A butterfly rested for a very long time on my toe the other day. I could have sworn it was giving me a wink. Of course, I thought it might be a message from you... ;->

Hi Guy,

Those vibes are a definite sign of the onset of the paralysis that is a prelude to sleep. There can be other even more bizarre and fascinating sensations and body distortions during this transition into sleep. The fact that you're aware during this stage is a step in the right direction if you're wanting to slip into a WILD.

One suggestion at this point, is to remain focused on the somatic sensations and see if a dream body develops that you can begin exploring with. Even if you don't see any particular body parts, objects or scenes right away, once you have the feeling of a dream body, try dropping to an imagined floor or reaching for what might be around you. Expectation can help conjure up the floor or a wall -- or something totally unexpected! You might try imagining that you're rubbing your dream hands together and see if the thought helps them manifest.

You can also use an imagined sensation of motion (like spinning, rocking or rubbing -- and I believe Ralf mentioned swimming in another recent post) to help maintain the state. And you can work on developing your imagination skills during the day. Try spinning, rocking, rubbing your hands in the daytime with your eyes closed to get an image-less feeling down in your mind and then try to feel the same sensations while lying still in bed as you're drifting into sleep.

Hope this leads you to a wonderful WILD experience, Keelin

Hi,

Thank you for responding Keelin.

I have a question: Will there be a Lucid dreaming camp in: July? or August?

Because I might go to the US.

Thanks, Guy.

Dear Guy and Oneironnaut Enthusiasts,

A Dreaming and Awakening workshop is now in the planning stages for August 1-10, 2001. Once again, it will be held in Paradise, but this time on the Big Island in Hawaii. Details will be announced soon, so stay tuned!

Aloha! Keelin

Dear Owen, dear Keelin.

Please excuse me for the long delay. I've been to osteopathy workshop for a week. Thanks a lot for your advice. Owen, you can see, that I used hand - rubbing to stabilise a dreamscene, just like you wrote. Keelin, funny you mentioned, that I'm on the right way and only need more adventures. Unaware of this post I did, what you recommended. During the workshop I had 90 minutes break at noon. I took a nap. And took another one in the evening and one before nights sleep. I used the SND in naps and night and did my RC/RI training in daytime. And I did learn somewhat osteopathy, too. ;-)

I found, that the evening naps were more successful, maybe because I was in no hurry.

Some notes of an evening nap (Thursday, 24.05.2001 duration: ~55min): I reach point 61. My intention: To solve my problems concerning swallowing and breathing. I want to surrender, I will not be so active. Relaxation is very effective, since I added these gentle light blue and warm Maui hot tub jets to deepen sensual imagination. The bony white pill rotates in point 61. Colours and whole images are building themselves up, as long as I'm able to focus GENTLY on the pill. Because of the continuous imagination of the pill I have no fear of these pictures. Sometimes I loose the focus. Then pictures are generated too quick, I frighten and skip out of them. But today it's a step forward in the continuous transition into the dream - world. In the beginning, I see myself driving the Hana - Highway. But there is no focus in the picture, because I'm not able to stay softly focussed on the pill. Again and again I'm forced to "look directly" at the Maui - scene. Everything is tumbling, like the camera - man is drunken. I'm excited, heart is beating fast and strong. I feel as if I could let myself go into the scene now, but I swallow and swallow and by this hold on to my physical body. Now there is a turn into the sugar cane plantation. Hooch! OK. I feel the plants on my body. The camera has a turn. Now I only see blue (sky). My whole body is surrounded by blue now. Pictures get faster. A car jumps at me from above. I hear music. In the end these are the words of the refrain(original English): "Is this the real life?" I look at my watch, check reality. The display shows a clarinet. OK. I'm dreaming. Whoosh. I'm awake. No time for rubbing or spinning. I get up and write.

A great success. Two successes: I have been able to watch a rather vivid scene lucidly and I did an RC and became lucid. The bad news: I'm still not able to let go of physical body's perception, lucidity still leads to prompt awaking.

Saturday, 26.05.2001

Evening nap. Relaxation gets deeper and deeper with training. Just at the deepest point I'm forced to cough. I'm out and can't get in again. :-<

Sunday evening, 27.05.2001

At first, I don't want to nap. I'm not tired, I'm not in the mood. I sit in front of the computer and get noon nap's SND data. The computer doesn't work, RC, I try to fix the bug. Now I'm tired. And I think of our next Maui experiment. This time I want to succeed! I didn't believe it could, but relaxation is getting deeper and deeper day to day. I think, today I have consciously reached real sleep paralysis. After a short drift into a non - lucid dream scene breathing turns automatic. I don't breath, it breathes. I get the image of myself dancing around an open fire on the plain. I'm an Indian. I try to stay in the picture, rub my dream hands. My perception of dream hands is clearer, than ever. I rub a stick with both hands, feel its raw texture. It's not difficult, to feel physical heavy body and the moving dream hands at the same time. Sometimes dream arms are inside the picture, sometimes in the void, linked to my physical shoulders, as they would physically be. I let go of counting and imagining the pill. Focus on the dream - body. I try and dance different patterns with the intention to loosen the rest of my dream body and make the dream scene more real. But concentration seems to be too wide spread out and is getting thinner. All perceptions turn pale, except perception of physical body, it is sharpening. The word "awake" gains new meaning regarding these kind of experiences. I seem to be awake now. RC button gives correct response. I've no difficulties to get out of paralysis, though arms seem heavier, than ever. I feel very well relaxed. And continue feeling peaceful for some hours.

Next time I will not expand the dream body too fast. Just stay with hand rubbing and stabilise dreamscene and dream body as good as I can. I've perceived a physical body image all the time, so I won't call this a WILD, but some imaging close to a dream.

On Monday I have two other sessions. It seems rather easy now to reach a point of paralysis and start to move the dream - body. But the closer I get to being completely in the dream, the more my fear grows. I fear to stop breathing. I swallow and swallow. It's annoying, and it's funny, to watch the chickenhearted Ego / Ralf / myself.

On Tuesday afternoon we learned about cranio - sacral osteopathy. There is a "treatment", when the patients (my)head is lying in the palms of the therapist. Again, a good occasion to surrender, that's what I thought. And I did let go, as far as I could. And there I (my head) sunk deeper and deeper into the therapists (another pupils) palms. A feeling of deep sadness emerged, with it a picture of myself as a baby in my mothers arms. Not quite sure, whether I can trust her. The tension in my throat prevents weeping. It is the sadness, the uncertainty and its defense. Whoosh. And out again, just like becoming aware, that I'm dreaming. There is not much time. This has been only the demonstration of the technique. I talk about my feelings to my "therapist"- co - pupil. This unfinished process leaves me in sadness until next day. But I'm fine, because I think, I have found a reason, why I'm afraid to surrender, be it to a lucid dream scene, a therapy or to love. The child, the baby in myself doesn't feel safe. I'm not sure, what to do about it, but I'm sure, that I will learn to surrender deeper and deeper, because I've already come this far.

This is what I meant, when I said, that the experiences on my way to WILDs are rewarding, even if I don't achieve a proper WILD.

Thank you, Owen and Keelin, one more time.

Yours Ralf

P.S. concerning butterflies: My eight year old son gave me a butterfly as a present. I was aware. And I performed a long and good laughter and a RC. My son laughed, too, although he didn't understand anything. He's just like me...

Dear Frustration Support Group, I posted a few months back trying to extend my LD with spinning or hand rubbing (typicaly 5-10 sec. long). Kileen's suggestion of rubbing my fingers together while flying wasn't enough to keep me lucid. I couldn't spin though I tried-why I don't know. Progress report: I've had 4 LDreams over the past 2 months and finally held on long enough to rub hands and got a LD over a minute! It took me about 3 months (last July thru Sept)to get my 1st LD. Currently i've gotten them about every 2-3 wks. The procedures suggested hear really work and LD is really fun and exotic, and hopefully in the future a growing source of self discovery for me. However it isn't easy: I get up for 30-45min. at 3 am or so, I always write out my dreams after my last 2 hrs of sleep, do 3-15 RC per day. Then there is the typical frustration of nightly intending to have a LD and most mornings not having had one. All this takes time and energy. I'm hopeful it will get somewhat easier and the LD more frequent and prolonged. Thanks for your encouraging and interesting posts.

Dear Ralf,

The hallucinations you describe associated with your WILD attempts are impressive. I do not seem to see such complex and lively things.

Towards the end of May I'm pleased to say that my dry spell ended and I had another "clump" of short LDs, but nothing again for a few days now. I'm searching for factors that correlate with the occurrence of lucid dreams for me.

To return to WILDs I had the following "dream" recently. It was a short time before I got up and I had been trying to relax and pay attention to the images in my mind. The blackness was interspersed with fleeting images, then (from my journal),

"I am looking at a white sign with red writing. I assume that I am awake and observing the latest in a series of hypnagogic hallucinations. I am surprised however that the image does not disappear or fade quite quickly like the others, and I speculate about whether I am awake or dreaming. It is pleasurable to calmly observe this clear image. I decide to try to move around. I float away to the left of the sign. I am in an area bounded by a tall wire fence; it reminds me of a tennis court. I think to rub my hands; I try but with no success, no hands appear. This suggests to me that I am not dreaming but rather observing a moving hypnagogic scenario. I feel and note the sensation of my body touching the bedclothes. I see the fence in front approaching and decide to try to pass through it. A hole morphs and I pass through. I think that with an effort I can make this a dream. I try to throw myself into a dream. All goes dark.' Then I opened my eyes. I was awake.

Afterwards I thought that the feeling of lying in bed might be a false awakening and that this was an LD. I cannot make up my mind whether this is or is not a LD.

What is SND?

Best wishes,

Owen

Ralf, ol' buddy,

Just a word about your occasional breathing, coughing, etc problems. Are you doing the relaxing exercise and going off to sleep on your back?

Somewhere I learned that the ideal sleep position is to lay on your right side with your right upper arm laying straight out from the body, elbow bent so that the hand can lay palm-up near your head. The left elbow should be resting on your waist, with the hand falling naturally in front of your stomach. The right knee should be raised higher than the left (about parallell to the hip) while the left knee falls under it. It's hard to explain, but just imagine a runner in profile, running from right to left, with his right hand and knee raised. Hell, I'll send you a drawing.

Anyway, this position is supposed to be the best for free heart action, minimum vascular restriction, ease of breathing, and minimum stress on the lower back.

Remember the Gazebo! :-)

Ruben Dataling

Notes on posture...

I just wanted to add some points on that idea of sleeping position... when I first began lucid dreaming without having done any research, I always used essentially that exact posture... my body just fell into it naturally. Since then I have found that this posture is recommended in at least one Tibetan Buddhist text on dream-consciousness (LD) (with the inclusion that the thumb and ring finger of the right hand should be touching pulse points on the neck). Also, coincidentally, this posture was recommended by Professor Cheng Man-Ch'ing (one of the great modern Masters of Tai Chi Chuan) as the best sleeping posture for cultivating internal energy, or "chi". --- just an aside... of course, hard to snuggle your spouse that way... oh well.

Peace Friends! JS

I don't know about you guys ........

....but for me, a bed always works ;-) Nothing feels as good, and LD's are guarenteed !

321, Daniel

It felt really strange to read through Alan's description of the ideal sleep position. Happily for Alan, the way it was described was not the cause of the strangeness... It was the fact that lately, since I've become concentrated on the LD stuff again, I have became aware of my sleeping habits - and I have discovered, that every time I go to sleep I (1) lie down on the left side spontaneously after switching off the light which is on the left side of the bed and then, after a while I (2) turn to the right side and soon after that fall asleep in exactly the same position as described by Alan..! I used to have problems falling asleep (leading to those frustrating and always unsuccessful attempts to FORCE myself to fall asleep) and thus got used to not going to bed before I feel really tired. However, this position, combined with proper relaxation seems to help me fall asleep earlier than 3am... After reading the preceding posts I finally decided to try an afternoon nap as soon as possible, though I never believed I am able to fall asleep during the day if not tired to death! Thanku all!

By the way, after reading all the posts I have missed due to goofing around for half a year or so (approximately 300 posts), it feels really strange, like I know all of you quite well... And I feel really ashamed for my absence to all the brilliant conversations you have had on this forum in the past. However, I'm back!

Many right dreams Mikolas

Owen, I think that when Ralf uses the term "SND," he means Super NovaDreamer. I had the same question. So, Ralf, what is it? Also, Ralf, I'll bet you won't cough and have trouble breathing now that you've quit smoking! What a good papa you are!

Hello to all... 8-)

I'm just new to this group and I'll be describing my experiences regarding Lucid Dreaming bellow.

There are several emotional factors connected to this experiences and I'll be very very short on telling what is going on. My personal history is that in the period from 1974 to 1997 I had 3 OBE like experiences, one of them very clear but not with details confirmed since I was with some health problems then. Then, from 1979 to 1997 I was blessed with a very very happy marriage with 3 kids. Also I worked seriously on a spiritualis society 15 years of this period with my wife. All fo a sudden in 1997 my family suffered a terrible car accident and my beloved wife and my 15 years old daugther bodies died. I decided then to look for them and have again that OBEs - I worked hard on this matter, despite all the suffering and pains. Since then I had about 50 to 60 OBE like experiences ' some of then quite real and astonishing - and then decide to invest all my energies on Lucid Dreaming. This happened cause I read dozens of books on the subject and related ones and decided this would be the best way for me. Of couse, one of the best was Exploring the World of Lucid Dreaming. Other one very important to me was The Ultimate Lucid Dreaming Manual.

The very first time I tried the wake-up-get-up-go back-to-bed method I had an exhilariating Lucid State experience. The very next 7 days I had 10 more Lucid States experience. All of them I "returned" to the conscience of my body due to the emotional thrilling impact from the experience of beeing lucid "somewhere" else than my dairy world.

Since then I had more lucid experiences on a irregular basis, some not so lucid, but most of them very short, and a few a little more longer.

Today, and this is the reason I'm posting here, I have absolutely no necessity of programing myself to wake up in the middle of the night. It happens all days without any effort from myself. But, as have been always happening, every time I discover a new trick, a new "aproach" to trigger the Lucidity, it works only for the first one or two times. And them it seldon happens again!

The last "trick" I used and that worked fine, was to repeat while dozzing off, that: "You" will become lucid next dream you have" "You" will become lucid next dream you have" "You" will become lucid next dream you have" That is: to treat myself as a "third" person. Also, Lucid Dreaming Tape 4 from The Monroe Institue has some effect on my dreaming. I have also to say that I have almost 2000 dreams writen down - unfortunately in portuguese - last 4 years.

So, my question is: 1) something inside me, without any effort, gives me permission to wake up every night to try to become Lucid; 2) but another thing inside me prevents me to become lucid unless I discover a new trick that will works for just a few times!!!

I tried almost everything from B Vitamins to inducing some hipnotic trance with several dregrees in intensity and frequency, Monroe tapes, and so on - but did not use and intend not to use any other chemical drugs.

Any suggestions???

thanks you very much

mario brazil ' south america

Alan - your sleeping position techniques seem an awful like traditional Buddhist Dream Yoga. See the Buddha in "perinirvana pose" ie laying on his side apparently asleep (actually dead). also see stephens experiments on sleep positions and nostril breathing on the site. good stuff. -- dominick

Dominick

I've remembered that Idries Shah taught me that position - an interesting conjunction of Tibetan Dream Yoga, Tai Chi, Sufi, and Osteopathy :-)

Mario,

Welcome to the asylum. Sorry to hear about your tragedy. I reckon if you stick around and keep posting here, you'll get good support for your LD objectives.